The Atheist News--Holy Eggplant Batman, Moyers on Rove, Julia Sweeney, Richard Dawkins, Silly Atheist Beaten Badly, More

When you can pimp a sidebar element (I recently joined the Atheist Blogroll, you can find it in my sidebar, scrolling under the Jolly, Candy-like Buttons) revive an element of your blogging shtick (I'm Antarctica's only Catholic Atheist blogger) and continue a running segment (The Other News, in which I do round-ups on particular topics) all at the same time, you have a blog post inspired by God herself.

On with, The Atheist News:

• The eggplant spells the end of atheism as we barely knew it.
• Famous atheist Karl Rove will be portrayed by PBS's Bill Moyers. Details here.
• CBS News has located the atheists' leader. It's Julia Sweeney. Surprise! So long Richard Dawkins. You had a good run. Anyway, CBS is doing a feature on atheism Sunday morning at 9am, you know, when all the churchies are at church and not watching. Very brave CBS News.
  
• In prime time, CNN will run God's Warriors, a six-hour series about how politically powerful fundies are in the three religions of which Americans have heard.
• Did you know that the new breed of atheists want to wipe religion off the map? That's because the new breed of atheists are fuckers! They won't let me get into their big secret strategy meetings--even after I figured out the secret location! God! It's so frustrating! It's the optical scanners that are currently keeping me at bay. I want to warn the new breed of atheists that if they wipe religion off the map that we on the atheist blogroll would no longer have anything to mock. I can't think of anything else to mock other than religion and I'm trying really hard.
• A South Carolina man wrote "fuck the skull of Jesus" on his windshield, then got brutally beaten and robbed (robbed!!??) by a hoard of Christians who decidedly did not turn the other cheek. The victim violated what I, in all seriousness, consider to be the most important rule of sound atheist ideology--don't be a total dipshit. It's rule number one, bro. And the Christian reaction was about as resoundingly un-Christian as possible. This story almost perfectly symbolizes religion and atheism in America--we just don't know the material.

VIDEO: During this CNN "Out in the Open" segment, some lady talks to Richard Dawkins because he's the only atheist alive.