On with, The Atheist News:
- The eggplant spells the end of atheism as we barely knew it.
- Famous atheist Karl Rove will be portrayed by PBS's Bill Moyers. Details here.
- CBS News has located the atheists' leader. It's Julia Sweeney. Surprise! So long Richard Dawkins. You had a good run. Anyway, CBS is doing a feature on atheism Sunday morning at 9am, you know, when all the churchies are at church and not watching. Very brave CBS News.
- In prime time, CNN will run God's Warriors, a six-hour series about how politically powerful fundies are in the three religions of which Americans have heard.
- Did you know that the new breed of atheists want to wipe religion off the map? That's because the new breed of atheists are fuckers! They won't let me get into their big secret strategy meetings--even after I figured out the secret location! God! It's so frustrating! It's the optical scanners that are currently keeping me at bay. I want to warn the new breed of atheists that if they wipe religion off the map that we on the atheist blogroll would no longer have anything to mock. I can't think of anything else to mock other than religion and I'm trying really hard.
- A South Carolina man wrote "fuck the skull of Jesus" on his windshield, then got brutally beaten and robbed (robbed!!??) by a hoard of Christians who decidedly did not turn the other cheek. The victim violated what I, in all seriousness, consider to be the most important rule of sound atheist ideology--don't be a total dipshit. It's rule number one, bro. And the Christian reaction was about as resoundingly un-Christian as possible. This story almost perfectly symbolizes religion and atheism in America--we just don't know the material.